IS it technically wrong

If I murder my husband in his sleep, but I have a darn good reason too?!?

Because last night was the worst nights sleep Ive had in the 2 and half weeks since i brought the baby home - and it was not Lara keeping me up.........

Its been hot here, last night was our first taste of summer heat, and since we switched rooms with the boys we have no more ceiling fan. SO in our warm room, with extra added heat from small sweet baby feeding, sleep was not really coming, but the minute I closed my eyes and felt sleep could come - husband snored, really, really really loudly.

All the tricks I normally employed - nadda. I kicked him, nadda, I rolled him back on the his side ( normally if he sleeps on a certain side he stops snoring) nadda, I blocked his nose so he stopped breathing - nadda ( though was tempted to keep doing it).

So because I have a really good reason, I should be allowed right? A judge will understand right???

But then I get moments like these and I think ill keep him after all.

Ps Besides who has energy to date and find a new husband......... Id have to put decent clothes on and start the house training all over again

Itty Bitty dress anyone??

Ok I have this printed out ( found here) , and about to choose my fabric for it ( Why yes, I do have fabric here that will work, but I really do still need to buy some more right? ...)

So what colours should I go with?? Im really feeling a bit overwhelmed by pink at the moment ( the sudden huge influx after years of it not playing a huge part in my childrens lives)

Im torn between and yellow and white polka dot, a red and white floral, or a navy and white thick stripe???

You know what I love

About being a mum of a girl,

Girly fabrics - loud bright fun girly print, soft romantic floral girly prints, all girl prints. For some reason the boys wont let me dress them in girly prints, stinky boys.

Things like this one

And this one

And this as well

Oh no, its a new stash I have to build, how awful for me.............

All found via Fabric Traders, a aussie online fabric shop ( That i suspect my hard earned money might end up at).

Ps they are also giving away free fabric ( they must not know that who ever dies with the most fabric wins......... dont tell them!! ) - details here

Cause the only thing cuter

Then a new baby, is a new baby with flowers on her head.

My poor Lara girl modeling some head bands mumma was making, (a couple were for friends so some of the bands had not been sewn to size yet.)

Ps a million times thank you for all the congratulations. Id missed blogging and sharing with people. I did sneak over o most of your blogs but part of me not feeling creative was not feeling like commenting cause it didnt seem to matter what i had to say to people, so it means a lot to get yours and know that a few people out there were still checking in.

Im not sure If anyone still reads here

but I made something pretty fantastic and just wanted to share.

Lara Paige was born on the 23rd of October still in her bag of waters ( apparently very lucky) and our hearts are full and happy.

Ps actually feel like creating again for the past couple of months so hopefully ill be back again soon!

Its been so very Long

And life has changed so very much. Reality is a lot different then it used to be. Life has wiped my ability to enjoy the things I used to do, I haven't scrapped or crafted in ages ( though I had a layout in the previous months SBM and I had 2 in the masters mag), I dont feel like baking, though I try and without these things in my life I just feel sort of lost. Im not sure how to fill my days without hobbies.

And while there have been moments of pure Joy ( , christmas, a new nephew, my mothers visit, Easter and my boys turning 2,6 and recently 12, ) they seem to get lost in an ocean of misery

I have surfed through and am on the tail end of a return to my anxiety disorder, which totally controlled my life for a while there. While it did also return depression for a bit — it was only very mild and not the huge soul breaking cloud I have been through before

My children have been sick more times then I can count — esp. in the last month.

My beautiful BIL has recently been diagnosed with a brain tumor, one the doctors say will kill him and this esp. is changing my life so many ways. My husbands heart is breaking each day — his families heart is breaking each day

And on the 26th of January my beautiful friend lost her baby — half an hour after it was born at 34 weeks on Australia day.

The same day I conceived my beautiful bean.

During all this craziness I have been given a gift that is helping me through,

A little girl ( well apparently, we will see if it stays the same at the next ultrasound)

Due in October.

Ps thanks for the emails — etc asking if all was well, Im so sorry I haven't replied, I just haven't had the words.

P.P.s I realise this is a very misery guts post and im sorry. I am having a dwelling morning.